Somehow we tend to consider ‘waiting’ as a rather passive attitude. There doesn’t seem to be much action involved with it. It’s just…waiting. Till ‘something’, the thing we have been waiting for, happens. And we sense relief – finally, we can continue! We can go on!
Waiting is a verb. It’s not an attitude – it’s something you can do, in which you can choose your attitude. You can be waiting expectantly, frustrated, impatient, patient, joyful…it’s up to you. And often a time of waiting will reveal that what’s hidden in your heart, that what is not shown when your life is a whirlwind of activities.
The past year I’ve learned about waiting, and I’ve learned about what’s really in my heart. And to be honest: I wasn’t too happy with what I discovered. When waiting, I’m not as joyful, patient and full of expectancy as I’d hoped, and expected, to be.
All I wanted was the waiting to be over.
Today I read a sermon by Tim Keller, on waiting on God and how Habakuk shows us how to. The thing that really struck me was the following, and I applied it to my own life.
When things don’t go the way I wanted, I get upset and start to get worried. All kinds of emotions start to rise. “If this or that doesn’t happen, life’s worth nothing.” Really? How would I know this so sure? I should let go of my assumptions. It will free me. Even the most wise people don’t know all the results. When I freak out because something doesn’t happen like I’d planned, I should realize that I’m not the Omniscient either. I freak out because I think I know what’s the best. But instead I should be humble.
I’m not suffering. I’m being blessed daily, and I have been given more than I ever needed. And there’s much more to come, many promises to be fulfilled. And while I’m waiting for God to place things in order, I’m learning that God is my everlasting rock, the rock that doesn’t move.
There are roads to be traveled in places I’ve never seen.
And I’ll wait.